Tooth decay was a perennial national problem that meant a mouthful of silver for patients; and for dentists a pocketful of gold. ~Claudia Wallis


I find that most men would rather have their bellies opened for five hundred dollars than have a tooth pulled for five. ~Martin H. Fischer


You know; sometimes a man just can't satisfy all of a woman's desires. Which is why God invented dental floss. ~Author Unknown


If suffering brought wisdom; the dentist?s office would be full of luminous ideas. ~Mason Cooley


A dentist at work in his vocation always looks down in the mouth. ~George D. Prentice


The man with a toothache thinks everyone happy whose teeth are sound. ~George Bernard Shaw


Dentist:? a prestidigitator who; putting metal into your mouth; pulls coin out of your pocket. ~Ambrose Bierce


Too many of today's children have straight teeth and crooked morals. ~Unknown high school principal


Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill. ~Johnny Carson


You don't have to brush your teeth - just the ones you want to keep. ~Author Unknown


If a patient cannot clean his teeth; no dentist can clean them for him. ~Martin H. Fischer


Some old women and men grow bitter with age; the more their teeth drop out; the more biting they get. ~George D. Prentice


Adam and Eve had many advantages; but the principal one was that they escaped teething. ~Mark Twain


There are two things in life that a sage must preserve at every sacrifice; the coats of his stomach and the enamel of his teeth. Some evils admit of consolations; but there are no comforters for dyspepsia and the toothache. ~Henry Lytton Bulwer


Every tooth in a man's head is more valuable than a diamond. ~Miguel de Cervantes; Don Quixote; 1605


We do have a zeal for laughter in most situations; give or take a dentist. ~Joseph Heller


I had very good dentures once. Some magnificent gold work. It's the only form of jewelry a man can wear that women fully appreciate. ~Graham Greene


I'm always amazed to hear of air crash victims so badly mutilated that they have to be identified by their dental records. What I can't understand is; if they don't know who you are; how do they know who your dentist is?? ~Paul Merton


A man loses his illusions first; his teeth second; and his follies last. ~Helen Rowland


The tongue is ever turning to the aching tooth. ~Thomas Fuller


Even pearls are dark before the whiteness of his teeth. ~William R. Alger